Mr. Dowling's Electronic Passport
Introductions
When Mr. Dowling calls on students to read, he often "introduces" them with accolades.   The best of the accolades are collected here. 
  • Soon to be the star of a new cartoon... 
  • His favorite politician is Sally Jessy "the Body" Raphael...
  • And now, a man they call Hercules...
  • Can't do homework on Wednesday because "Dawson's Creek" is on... 
  • He just secretly married Carmen Electra...
  • Her science project is taking pencil shavings and trying to make a new pencil...
  • Someone who can eat his own weight in Tapioca... 
  • Someone who gets under your skin faster than a splinter on a waterslide...
  • The person who coined the term “huh...” 
  • Someone who ordered glasses from Lenscrafters minutes before setting the clock ahead one hour...
  • Window tinter of the year... 
  • Someone whose breath reeks of Turtle Wax... 
  • His favorite rapper is Notorious B.I.G.B.I.R.D....
  • The next president of the United Auto Workers... 
  • Someone who is kooky over Cocoa Puffs... 
  • Fresh from his performance at the Super Bowl halftime show... 
  • The father of our country... 
  • Big Bird’s best friend in the whole wide world... 
  • The newest member of the cast of 90210... 
  • The world’s greatest expert in lunchbox repair... 
  • And now, the new dime a minute lady... 
  • Some who really believes Trix are for kids... 
  • Someone who puts ketchup on ice cream... 
  • Same great kid with half the calories... 
  • Someone who looks nothing like Barney Rubble... 
  • Someone who is hyper on Chips Ahoy... 
  • The voice of Marge Simpson... 
  • Soon to be dating Billy on Melrose Place... 
  • Pasteurized for your enjoyment... 
  • Someone who thinks that darn Marmaduke to just too funny... 
  • The artist formerly known as Prince... 
  • Some who think the Forrest Gump is such a dad-gum card... 
  • The inventor of the Macarena... 
  • Tiger Beat Teen of the Year... 
  • The host of the new Japanese game show... 
  • Someone who refuses to look both ways before crossing the highway... 
  • Someone made with 10% real juice... 
  • The first name in air conditioning repair... 
  • The mayor of West Palm Beach... 
  • Someone who wants to grow up to be Spiderman... 
  • Prince William's latest girlfriend... 
  • He keeps going and going and going... 
  • A man who Coolio calls “my inspiration...” 
  • Anastasia was her grandmother.  Yeah, really! 
  • Someone who never does their homework on “Must See TV” night... 
  • His favorite food is Egg McMuffins with pickles and turkey gravy... 
  • Someone who knows almost all the words to the Pledge of Allegiance... 
  • More entertaining than HBO... 
  • His favorite food is aerosol cheese.
  • The new lead singer for T.L.C. ... 
  • He has a crush on Quinn Morgendorfer... 
  • Someone who has an imaginary friend name Louie... 
  • The person who answers when you call the Psychic Friends Network... 
  • Star forward for the Chicago Bulls... 
  • World Yahtzee champion... 
  • The creator of the Internet... 
  • Someone still trying to figure out where to plug in his pencil... 
  • The former star of those “Home Alone” movies... 
  • Someone who wants to grow up to be Al on “Home Improvement.” 
  • Someone who really wants to go back to Kansas... 
  • Soon to replace Jim Sackett on the 6 and 11... 
  • Some people call him the space cowboy, some call him the gangster of love... 
  • Chelsea Clinton's secret boyfriend... 
  • The Spice Girl on the left... 
  • Coming soon to a theater near you... 
  • One partyin' dude... 
  • More clueless than Cher... 
  • Soon to be a guest on Oddville U.S.A.... 

 

 

To cite this page:
Dowling, Mike., "The Electronic Passport to Mr. Dowling's Introdctions," available from http://www.mrdowling.com/introductions.html; Internet; updated Friday, July 27, 2001

©2009, Mike Dowling. All rights reserved.